Easy Open Cap, Complete Nonsense

See the words on the lid of this bottle of macapuno (coconut fruit preserves)?

Self has been trying to get at the contents for two days. Granted, anyone who spends two days trying to open a bottle must be bonkers. But self really, really loves macapuno. And she hasn’t had any in about 10 years.

In Redwood City, she used to have this nifty thingamajig by Zyliss that wrenches open bottle caps in 10 seconds. But here, she hasn’t seen any store that sells the thing. So, she has to resort to:

  • running bottle neck under warm water
  • pounding on top lid with knife, block of wood, and hammer
  • inserting knife tip under the lid to break seal
  • wrapping lid with rubber bands and twisting and twisting and twisting

The Filipino manufacturer should be proud! They have perfected the super-tight seal! Bottle lid’s tighter than a seal on an oil rig! Paging BP Oil! No, even better, paging NASA!

In the meantime, those words EASY OPEN CAP on the lid are simply taunting her. Has the manufacturer never heard of “truth in advertising”? This dilemma has also given rise to snarky thoughts such as: You want the macapuno? You can’t handle the macapuno!

This problem would not occur in the Philippines where self recalls never having to touch food of any kind — because of help! LOL — unless it is delivered on a tray.

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Jar of Macapuno, Absolutely Impenetrable. “Easy Open Cap.” Bought two days ago. Enough is enough. Tossing today. Good-bye, $3.99

When all hope is lost, self shares her dilemma on Facebook. Which then leads to a Filipina sending her a link to this instructional video, which contains the words: “Even a two-year-old should have no problem opening a bottle lid using this method.”

LOL LOL LOL

Stay tuned.

What Is Life But a Bowl of Cherries

  • Let’s celebrate the cherries on top! — Michelle W., The Daily Post

The good news: self was back in London in the spring. The Cherry on Top? She was there during the week of the annual Chelsea Flower Show. Just look at the fresh flowers framing the entrance to the Bloomsbury Hotel!

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The Bloomsbury Hotel, London: May 2016

The good news was: Self was in Philo, CA. She found a small market that sold delicious potato salad. And the cherry on top? The ceiling lights were things of beauty. From a glass studio in Fort Bragg, the checkout lady told self:

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Ceiling Light, Lemon’s Philo Market, California

The good news was: self was spending another winter in Mendocino, CA. The cherry on top is that she got to see “Quills,” a play about Marquis de Sade, performed by members of the local community (It was a very entertaining production!)

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“Quills,” a drama about Marquis de Sade

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

Quote of the Day: Lewis Carroll

“You alarm me!” said the King. “I feel faint — give me a ham sandwich!”

On which the messenger, to Alice’s great amusement, opened a bag that hung round his neck, and handed a sandwich to the King, who devoured it greedily.

“Another sandwich!” said the King.

Alice in Wonderland, Chapter VII (“The Lion and the Unicorn”)

CHERRY ON TOP: MORE OF THE 2016 CALGARY STAMPEDE

This week’s Daily Post Photo Challenge is: CHERRY ON TOP.

This week, share a photo of a detail that makes a good thing even better.

— Michelle W., The Daily Post

Self goes searching back over her photos. She takes her time about it because she has thousands.

She decides to post more from the 2016 Calgary Stampede.

That event is great fun. From the carnival prizes to the everyone-in-cowboy-boots-and-hats affect to the way-too-many food booths selling everything from Colossal Onions to Deep-Fried Cheesecake (Please, do not ever go to Calgary if you are attempting to lose weight). The weather cooperated, too: it was slightly overcast. Sometimes it rained. Nice walking weather.

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Prizes, Calgary Stampede, July 2016: Aren’t these adorable?

Self loves shortcake. But Deep Fried Shortcake? BLISS!

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Calgary Stampede: Sheer Bliss For Anyone Who Likes Deep Fried Anything

Calgary, what a fabulous city. The Cherry on Top is:

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Do you really think self wouldn’t post a picture of herself during the 2016 Calgary Stampede? This was taken towards the end of a very exciting day! Cherry on Top was the wearing of a cowboy hat! YEEEES YEEEEES YEEEEES !!! (Pixie, boo, where’s YOUR cowboy hat???)

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

Look Up 5: Nando’s Flame-Grilled Chicken, Calgary

Really love The Daily Post Photo Challenge this week: LOOK UP.

It’s all about “taking a moment to check out what’s above you.”

Last night, self’s cousins took her to a restaurant called Nando’s, in NE Calgary. It’s famous for its chicken inasal (barbecue). And she has to say: this is the best chicken inasal she’s ever tasted outside of Bacolod City in Negros Occidental, Dear Departed Dad’s hometown.

The owner is, interestingly enough, not Filipino. She thinks her cousins said the owner is from Australia.

One wall is entirely covered with little squares, each one telling a kind of story. She wouldn’t have bothered focusing on the squares if she hadn’t been thinking of LOOK UP:

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Nando’s, in Northeast Calgary: Barbecue Chicken Almost as Good as Bacolod’s Inasal.

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Those tiles do tell a fascinating story. Wouldn’t you agree, dear blog readers?

Stay tuned.

Look Up 3: More From the Calgary Stampede

Would self have thought of taking these shots at this year’s Calgary Stampede if she hadn’t been trying to meet The Daily Post Photo Challenge this week:  LOOK UP?

Most likely, not. Yeah.

(The Calgary Stampede has some serious eats, dear blog readers. Serious, serious eats!)

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Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

Partners 2: Summer 2016

Share an image of partners. A pair, a trio, a sextet; people, buildings, plants — whatever you choose to shoot, give us subjects that are in tune with one another.

— Michelle W., The Daily Post

Life is full of little pleasures. And for self’s second post on The Daily Post theme this week, PARTNERS, self decided to focus on three of her favorites: summer; prosciutto; and Chez Mamie in London!

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Summer and Vintage Cars go together like white on rice!

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Prosciutto and Melon: Another Great Summer Pairing

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Mother & Daughter at Self’s Little Piece of Home in London, Chez Mamie! They make their own jam, which are those little bottles in the foreground. Self goes ga-ga over their salads.

P.S. Self saw Independence Day: Resurgence today, and it was pretty good! She was pleasantly surprised at Liam Hemsworth, too. He seemed much looser than he ever was in The Hunger Games movies. So, a good popcorn movie, most definitely.

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

More Curves!

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Bed & Breakfast, Inchicore, Dublin, May 2016

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The Last Bookstore, S. Spring St., Downtown Los Angeles, March 2016

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Hand Made Ice Cream in Downtown Fort Bragg, California, March 2016

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

SILHOUETTE: Sylvain Landry Week 48 Photo Challenge

Ahhh, yet again Sylvain Landry comes up with a great photo challenge!

It’s SILHOUETTE.

Browsing her photo archives, self came across this one: the ceiling light of The Red Room above the Café Paradiso in beautiful Cork, Ireland.

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Cork, Ireland: May 2016

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

WIP: “Dear Sister”

Self started writing this one today, while she was having lunch at Chez Mamie on Hanway Street.

Thankfully, today not as much noise from the ever-present construction crews. Next time she returns to London, there will be a building just a few yards from Chez Mamie. A building filled with luxury condos and a Primark.

Dear Sister:

I carry you with me everywhere.

You’re a ghost or a fetch, I’m not sure which.

Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.

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