Self has no idea whether “compostion” is a real word, and she’s in too much of a hurry today to look it up. She only gave herself 10 minutes to peruse a new Everlark fan fic, and here’s a cheeky passage (It’s about a future world where women rule over men, and men are kept chained in the basement for the sole purpose of reproduction. Like that? Thought you might, lol! In this story, Peeta is Katniss’s slave and Finnick is Annie’s)
News Flash! (You’re supposed to procreate, not fall in love, dammit!)
- Annie Cresta of 12 was reported for emotional compostion with her former slave, Finnick Odair. We realize you’ve all been patiently waiting for an update on this atrocity and we’re finally able to give you the news. Such a disgraceful act cannot continue unpunished. Therefore, at the end of the week, the slave Odair will be publicly executed for the crime of leading one of our own astray. Come along and witness the event, cheering!
Anyhoo, Katniss’s Aunt Effie gifts Peeta to her as a sixteenth birthday present:
“Katniss, this is your slave. Responds to the name of Peeta and will do whatever you wish. Whatever you wish.”
Wait, Katniss thinks. Did my Aunt Effie just wink at me?
Katniss’s mouth “falls open” at this exchange, and Effie says:
“So pure! It’s so sweet.” Effie taps Katniss’s jaw closed. “You’ll catch flies, honey.”
And why does Finnick always have to end up dead? Self’s just saying. He’s the Leonardo di Caprio of fan fiction.