SPOILER ALERT! Also, if you really can’t stand Vampires, then stop reading.
When you took Tessa with you into that dastardly den of iniquity, and she was masked as a Vampire and you were pretending to be her subjugate, and when a Vampire named de Quincey almost bit your neck, and you had to pretend that you were a mummy or something, letting his fangs emerge —
And when you were watching that Vampire performance, when every Vampire was watching you instead of Tessa, because somehow they knew you weren’t a subjugate —
And when you reached up to touch your waistcoat pocket and Tessa noticed you had goosebumps, because “the room was cool, not like a room crowded with human beings, who would have been giving off body heat” —
And when you raised that Phosphor high in the air and were prepared to take on a whole auditorium of Vampires all by yourself, self did nearly faint. Because every single Vampire in the room just wanted to drain you of everything. And # 1 Vampire Baddy made you and screamed “Stop that boy!” and you shouted, “I am not a boy, I am NEPHILIM!”
Self just wanted to die.
OK, when is the movie adaptation? And please DO NOT CAST A HEMSWORTH. It’s gotta be someone slender. Fey, as self said in an earlier post. IanSomerhalder.2 or similar.
And, Jem, why do you have to be such a sop? Self knows you cough blood or something and end up marrying Tessa in Book 2 (Reader, Did you not read the words SPOILER ALERT at the top of this post?) but you are way not as cool as Will Herondale.
Moreover, self’s always preferred the name “Will” to “Jem.” For some reason.
Self has to stop so she can continue reading Chapter 11 (“Few Are Angels”) It is so cool that Cassandra Clare opens the chapter with these lines from Shakespeare’s King Henry VIII:
We all are men,
In our own natures frail, and capable
Of our flesh; few are angels.
Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.