NO to the following:
- stories in which a milquetoast civilian government is depicted as the sole obstacle to either catching some depraved criminal or to an uncomplicated military victory
- stories in which the words “thou” or “thine” appear
- talking cats
- talking swords
- stories where the climax is dependent on the spilling of intestines
- stories where FTL travel is as easy as it is on television shows or movies
- time travel
- stories that depend on some vestigial belief in Judeo-Christian mythology in order to be frightening (i.e., Cain and Abel are vampires; the End Times are ‘a-comin’; Communion wine turns to Christ’s blood, literally; and it’s HIV positive; Satan’s gonna getcha, etc.)
- stories about rapists-murderers-cannibals
- stories about young kids playing in some field and discovering ANYTHING: a body, an alien craft, Excalibur, ANYTHING.
Stay tuned.