For several moments during last night’s Oscar Tele-cast, self thought she was watching a milder version of John Belushi in “Animal House.”
The laughs were pretty forced, she didn’t like that opening (“I saw Kate Winslet’s boobs, boobs, boobs.” Sheesh! Do you really expect women to laugh at a man in a tux singing about boobs?)
But during the second half of the tele-cast, the very heavily padded show had self gasping for more MacFarlane. Then, she actually began to appreciate him.
She didn’t understand what Affleck meant when he said, as he walked downstage to give the requisite “Thank You for This Award” speech: “I actually thought it was going pretty well. Maybe Seth can turn it around.”
She didn’t know why the First Lady had to be part of the ceremony (She looks great, though. Like she really does belong with the glitterati. She is so fit, so toned, so attractive, so vibrant. Can you imagine any other First Lady being part of an Oscar tele-cast? But is being glamorous and attractive all that important to being a First Lady? Self, just where are you going with this?)
So happy for Ang Lee, though. So, so happy.
She still thinks it was a crime that Django Unchained wasn’t nominated for Best Costume. Jamie Foxx in electric blue satin get-up, brandishing a bullwhip? Are you kidding? If Avatar could be nominated in the Best Costume category (When the costumes were CGI!), Django Unchained could be, too!
Why is Kerry Washington so thin? The actress is almost vanishing before our eyes! Puh-lease don’t go the Angelina route, Kerry!
Stay tuned, dear blog readers. Stay tuned.