The Halloween Masquerade on CBS’s “Early Show”

CBS Early Show, what a hoot!  It’s just 8 a.m. and self is rather bleary-eyed for the following reasons:

  • She slept at 2 and woke to the li’l crits’ whining, at 7:30.
  • She finished writing an article on Burma, late last night.
  • She read 100+ pages of Irene Nemirovsky’s startling and heartbreaking Suite Francaise, a portrait of French citizens fleeing German occupation forces during World War II:  brilliant, just brilliant.

She switches on flat-screen HDTV and of course it’s already on CBS because self has to end each day with her David Letterman/Craig Ferguson fix.

Everyone on staff is in costume:  First there’s Maggie Rodriguez as Adam Lambert.  She comes out lip-synching!  She starts working the audience (among whom is an Octomom impersonator with eight baby dollies fastened to her chest and huge, blow-up red lips —  Ha ha ha ha, grrreat!!!)  She has Joan Jett hair, black leather jacket, tight black jeans, and mucho mucho dark eye-liner!  Woo-hoo!  At first self thought it was Adam Lambert, just with breast implants!  Four stars!

Next, Russ Mitchell appears!  He has furry sideburns pasted on his cheeks!  He has two-foot long slasher-nails!  He emerges with solemn mien, Wolverine hands crossed across his chest!  Self will give his impersonation three stars, for it’s so clearly still Russ.

Hands-down winner:  Harry Smith channeling Julia Child!  The wig!  The pearls!  The pink tailored shirt!  And, most of all, the falsetto!  The cooking demonstration in which he begins to crack eggs on Chris Wragge’s forest green suit!  The yellow rubber chicken!  Self thinks Harry’s impersonation of Julia can certainly give Meryl Streep’s a run for the money!  Five stars!

Stay tuned, dear blog readers, stay tuned.

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