New York is Hawwttt!!

Self is melting.  None of the places she visited today had a working air-conditioner.  Of course, this might result in loss of pounds (sort of like the effect of a steam sauna —  all that fat gets sweated out of your pores).  Self was just thinking today, as she waited on the platform for the No. 1 train heading downtown, that she couldn’t imagine having a job like that of the Indian guy manning the magazine stand on the platform.  Two women went up to him and asked for a soda.  When he handed it over, one of them squawked:  “Damn!  This is hot!  I don’t want no hot soda!  Gimme my money back!”

Can you imagine sitting in a sweltering dungeon for 12 hours (or however long his stand remains open) at a stretch?  Smelling all that foetid air?  People’s perspiration mixed with the puddles of stagnant water between the subway tracks?  La la la!  Self is so thankful she lives in California!  Where her only contact with other human beings is at the Safeway!  Or through e-mail!

On the other hand, she has not encountered a single rude person here in New York.  Not in one whole week.  Self has said it before:  New Yorkers have to be the most patient people on earth.  They never complain if someone’s taking too long at the check-out stand, and self can’t recall even hearing anyone leaning on the horn (Of course, she did see a sign on 72nd and Broadway that said:  DON’T HONK!  $350 PENALTY!).  They love their dogs, they oblige strangers by giving them directions, and they generally exude an air of patient resignation, something along the lines of: “We’re all in this together, so quit ‘cher beefing.”

Self saw that very clearly on her very first night in the City, where everyone huddled in the narrow awnings around the Delacorte Theatre to wait for word on whether or not “Twelfth Night” would actually be performed that night.  People were sipping wine, munching on sandwiches, all huddled together in a few inches of dry ground, and no one pushed or shoved or groaned or whined.  If this were California, you can be sure there would at least be plenty of the whining.  We Californians are so spoiled.

Stay tuned, dear blog readers, stay tuned.

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