On Her 2nd Hour at Starbucks, Downtown SLO

Saw “Terminator: Salvation” again. Self’s brain has died. Self would dearly love to go on about the movie’s director, McG, but self is afraid that son’s feelings will be hurt if he reads this post. Son’s friend Kramer, who is a very intelligent person, liked the movie “except for the end.” Self would like to say she discovered some further redeeming value in this product, the second time around, but — (Self! Haven’t you said you would not rip into this movie? OK, enough!)

The only other people in the audience were two bearded youths, probably the only geeks self has seen so far this trip, and three blonde girls in the row directly behind who were constantly erupting in giggles. At least, Moon Bloodgood is at hand and she is still fun to watch for she has that walk. There are chase scenes, which are diverting. And there is still Sam Worthington (self understands he is James Cameron’s leading man in “Avatar”). But, self just wants to get this one off her chest: Any action movie that features a cute kid is sure to be bad. That’s why “Aliens” was bad. If “Avatar,” James Cameron’s new movie, has a cute kid in it, self will refuse to watch it. Self feels that if one is going to use a kid in an action movie, better make it an ugly kid, like the one in “Road Warrior.” (Who calls a kid “Star”??? Oh, she forgot: this was set in LA. Even in post-Apocalytpic LA, names must have singular meanings)

Son says he really wants to see “Transformers 2.” Self thinks that Megan Fox is a fox (and they are always showing the same scene of her in the preview: the one where she sits astride a motorcycle). In real life, a woman like this would never look twice at Shia. Where is self going with this? Again, self’s brain has died. Luckily, she decided to tote along her laptop and that is why she is now seated at a Starbucks directly across from the Barnes & Noble in downtown SLO. Hubby and son are once again engaged in browsing books. Self is here checking her on-line class on her laptop. It’s been two hours: hubby and son must be reading entire books. Hubby keeps saying how happy he is not to be in the office, so even though self thinks she could never ever spend that much time in a Barnes & Noble, she tells herself: Bite ‘cher tongue, woman!

Most of the guys here look like Zac Efron, and most of the girls are blonde and tanned and look like Hayden Panetierre. Outfit of choice: tube tops and metallic sandals. Toe-nail color of choice: bright pink or sky-blue. Hubby has remarked several times today that son is very lucky to have gone to a college where there are so many good-looking women. (Hubby attended Stanford in the mid-1980s. Perhaps the campus was a different place then. That is, there were probably a lot less women in Engineering. No wonder hubby feels deprived!)

Weather is slightly cooler than yesterday. Self today imbibed a sinful cottage cream cheesecake topped with fresh boysenberries at a restaurant on Avila Beach. Then, had a peanut butter/chocolate chip cookie at a place called Cowboy Cookies in downtown SLO. She’s trying to keep the eating down but, boy, it is hard.

Stay tuned, dear blog readers, stay tuned.

Iain Kelly

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